Berkeley, California (EastBayDaily) — As Valentine’s Day approaches, Jewish singles are becoming more concerned about their relationship status—are they going to have a date on Valentine’s Day, or will they be spending the most romantic night of the year alone, dwelling on the fact that they’re spending the most romantic night of the year alone?
Tamar Caspi, JDate advice columnist and author of How to Woo a Jew: The Modern Jewish Guide to Dating and Mating, says that rather than being worried about looking for a date this February 14th, look for love that will last forever. Although desperate times often call for desperate measures, be sure you don’t fall into the trap of scrambling to find a Valentine just so you aren’t alone, as disheartening as that may seem. Instead, use Caspi’s expert tips to find your beshert—your soul mate—to spend all future Valentine’s Days with.
1. Plan Ahead: Don’t let desperation cloud your judgment. Make plans with your other single friends to grab a few drinks or see a movie. There’s safety in numbers, and you’re less likely to go out with someone who isn’t right for you on Valentine’s Day if you already have plans.
2. Log on to JDate: If you’re not already a member, then join. If you are a member, then use Valentine’s Day as a reason to edit your profile. Can you narrow or expand your preferred age range? Are your stats still up to date? Do you have new photos to upload? Perhaps there are new members who you haven’t checked out yet. Take the time to click on some Secret Admirers, Flirt, or email some prospects. You can’t complain about being a single Jew on Valentine’s Day if you’re not active online.
3. Spread the Word: Don’t be ashamed of your single status. Let your family and friends know that you are ready and willing to be set up. Give them some guidelines, along the lines of what JDate asks for in their profiles (age, education, level of Judaism, etc.), and anything else of importance to you—without going overboard. If your list of non-negotiables is too long, people will get turned off about setting you up.
4. Get Out of the House: You won’t meet anyone sitting at home watching television. Join hobby groups, hit up happy hour with your coworkers, and start saying yes to invitations instead of finding reasons to say no. And those singles mixers you’ve been avoiding? Go.
5. Put Your Best Self Forward: Increase your chances of attracting quality suitors by making sure you’re presenting yourself in the best possible light. Nobody wants to date a downer. How can you make your life better? Do it for yourself first, and it will help attract dates. Have you been putting off working out? Get to the gym. Not only will seeing a difference in your body make you feel better, but the endorphins you release while exercising will also help you stay positive.
6. Revamp Your Attitude: Speaking of staying positive, don’t let a frown get you down. Not only is smiling attractive, but it also sends signals to your brain that you’re happy. If you hate your job, then begin your search to find something you love doing. Change your life because you want to, not for someone else, and you will see changes in your love life, too. The best tip to help you woo your Jew is to enjoy your life with confidence.
For more about Tamar Caspi, visit howtowooajew.com. Be sure to also follow her on Twitter @jewishlove and at facebook.com/howtowooajew.
About Seal Press
Seal Press was founded in 1976 to provide a forum for women writers and feminist issues. Since then, Seal has published groundbreaking books that represent the diverse voices and interests of women—their lives, literature, and concerns. Seal’s authors are radical and original thinkers, professionals with a distinct point of view, gutsy explorers, truth-tellers, and writers who engender laughter, tears, and rage. Seal Press publishes books with the goal of informing women’s lives. Based in Berkeley, California, Seal is a member of the Perseus Books Group. To learn more, visit sealpress.com.